She Wants to Relax in the Demonstration of Your Direction

From Bluetruth

A woman must be able to trust you to take charge if she relaxes her own masculine edge. This is true financially, sexually, emotionally, and spiritually. The man doesn't have to actually do all the work, but he must be able to steer the course if his woman is going to relax into her feminine without fear.

Some women want to be in charge most of the time. This desire to guide direction--handling the remote control for the tv or choosing the city in which to live--is a masculine desire, in men and women. If your woman has a more masculine sexual essence, she will prefer to be in charge of the direction of your lives most of the time.

But if your woman has a feminine sexual essence, there will be times that she would like to pleasurably relax and let go of being in charge. She would like to relax in her feminine and let you make the decisions. If you are not able to take charge, if you don't know the direction you want to go, your woman will feel you floundering. She will have to take charge again, since you are unable. She won't be able to relax.

The more relaxed she is in her feminine, the more radiant your woman will be. You have probably noticed that your woman's radiance can change instantly. One moment she might seem dull and weary. Then, perhaps after you praise her or surprise her with a gift of love, suddenly she is glowing. She looks 15 years younger. The lines in her face have disappeared in seconds.

If you want your woman to be able to relax into her feminine and shine her natural radiance, then you must relieve her of the necessity to be in charge. This doesn't mean you need to boss her around. It means you need to know where you are heading and how you are going to get there, in every way, including financially and spiritually.

If you have the slightest uncertainty or ambiguity about your financial future, your woman will feel it. You don't have to say anything about it. She'll feel your doubt or ambiguity in your body, eyes, and the tone of your voice. It's not that you have to make a lot of money; you just have to be responsible for your finances and take your future into account.

You might choose to be a monk; what's important is that you are clear, accountable, and directed from your deepest core of wisdom. Then, your woman can relax. She knows where you stand and what your plans are. She can feel your integrity. She can trust your direction, because she knows it comes from your deepest core. She is not swimming in the air of your uncertainty but standing on solid ground, the ground that you've provided by your clarity.

Even more important is your spiritual direction. Where is your relationship going? What are your lives about? What does it all add up to? How will the two of you continue to grow without getting stuck in the ruts of mediocrity?

If your woman feels that you have lost your spiritual direction, she will seek direction herself and attempt to impose it on you, since you don't seem to have any yourself. If she feels that you are totally absorbed in your work, for instance, and when you're not obsessing about your career you are absorbed in tv, then she will wonder, "Is this it? Is this what our relationship amounts to? Is this the highest vision that my man sees?" If she feels you lacking in your financial clarity or your spiritual clarity, she will not be able to relax with you. She will automatically begin directing her own life, and probably yours too. She will develop her own masculine direction, since you are lacking. And, by doing so, her radiance will diminish.

The more ambiguous you seem, financially and spiritually, the more she will need to pour her energy and attention into her own masculine direction and goals. For some women, this is great; they need to develop their own masculine energy. Other women, however, have already developed their masculine. They would like the opportunity to relax their own masculine and receive yours as a gift. How can you tell if your woman's self-direction is healthy for her? If she becomes more and more full and happy as she pursues her direction, then it is good for her. If she becomes more and more stressful, taught, and emotionally angular, then she is animating excess masculine direction. She is pushing herself in ways that may signal your irresponsibility.

How can you be more responsible? Not necessarily by doing more work. You become more responsible by knowing your deepest purpose, and then arranging your finances and spiritual life from that knowingness. For your woman to relax in her radiance and feminine happiness, she needs to feel that she can get on your train and that it's going exactly where she wants to go. It doesn't matter if your woman earns more or less money than you--or even if she earns all the money in the relationship. What matters is if she can feel your loving clarity, wisdom, and certainty of direction. As long as she can feel that you are taking the finances into account and arranging your lives together so that the deepest love and fullest gifts can manifest, she will be able to trust your masculine direction and relax in her feminine heart of radiance.