Appreciate Dissatisfaction
From Bluetruth
Dissatisfaction can remind you to open fully, now.
Close your eyes for a moment, relax, and remember how it feels to be deep in sleep. Imagine, right now, that you are sound asleep. Let go of the world for a moment, and just rest in the place of sleep. With your eyes closed, sink into the deep bliss of sleep for a few minutes, without actually falling asleep.
Then slowly open your eyes, but continue to feel the bliss of sleep. Allow the world around you to appear, but stay in contact with the deep bliss of sleep. You can actually feel the deeply fulfilling quiet bliss of sleep even now, while you are awake. You can see the world around you and interact with people while maintaining feeling-connection with the part of you that is bliss-full of sleep, even now.
Practice to feel the bliss of sleep now and randomly throughout the day. Close your eyes briefly or leave them open, and for a moment fall into sleep’s bliss. Feeling sleep’s bliss, open your eyes and live your day, open to the world around you, while also remaining open to the ever-present bliss of sleep.
Right now, you can open to the world around you, as well as to your thoughts and emotions, and also to the silent purr, the blissful unseen fullness of sleep. Alternatively, you can limit yourself to just one part of who you are.
For instance, you can concentrate on your thoughts or get lost in your emotions, thus becoming unaware of the world around you, stubbing your toe. You may be drawn so fully into the world—running from one chore to another—that you lose touch with the ever-present bliss of sleep, thus feeling bereft of deep peace. You can also fall asleep and totally lose awareness of your thoughts and the world around you, while the water boils on the stove and you miss your appointment.
In any moment, you can limit yourself to one part of the open moment that is available to you, or you can practice to open and feel all with less bounds. Now and any time, you can open and feel your outer world of sight and sound, your inner world of thoughts and emotions, and also the deep, seamless, fullness of sleep’s ever-present bliss. You can feel open as the entire moment, and then open as feeling itself, feeling open without any bounds, even as daily life continues.
Practice relaxing fully open, feeling all, for a few moments. Feel the bliss of deep sleep right now, and also continue with your thoughts while your eyes are open to the light of day. As you practice opening—feeling from unseen depth through inner world to the vivid light that is your day—your hold on “who you are” relaxes. You are a character that moves through your world all day, but also you are a character in your daydreams and nightdreams, as well as being the unbodied bliss-fullness of deep sleep.
You are openness, enjoying the undisturbed depth of sleep’s bliss as well as the everyday adventures of inner and outer life. And right now, you can open as all of you, from blissful depth to agitated surface.
You become unhappy in any moment that you assume you are limited to the surface, to the body of daily adventure. You feel partial. You can intuit deep openness—full of love and light, utterly free of constraint—but you can’t seem to find and keep it in your life.
So you search for deeper love in your relationships and more freedom in your lifestyle, but it never adds up to the open fullness that you secretly know is your true home. You try to arrange yourself and the world so your suffering diminishes, but always there is the continual stress of hoping for more success or love.
You cannot arrange yourself or the world in order to experience openness, but in any moment you can simply feel open.
Everything in this world dies. No arrangement lasts. Your fancy car will get scratched, your body will become diseased, your lover will betray you or vanish. Dissatisfaction is healthy; you are sensitive to the truth—you are suffering as things change and disappear.
The more profound truth is that you are alive as unbound love-fullness, deep as sleep, wide as awake. In the roll of everything happening, feel open as this entire moment, just as it is, as deep as you are.
Relax open your belly. Ease open your mind. Feel open where sleep’s bliss abides. Feel your thoughts and emotions and perceptions bloom open and gone. Breathe the openness of the moment in and out of your heart, as if you were breathing the changing colors of the day, inhaling and exhaling the light of a dream, breathing the bliss of deep sleep, in and out, breathing the love that lives as everyone, in and out, as you melt full open feeling all.
Welcome dissatisfaction as a reminder, and practice feeling open as this entire moment. Open, now and ever, allowing your actions to blossom as love.
